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Category Archives: Sidewallk

Don’t Fuck With Me! Hollywood Police Community Relations

It’s open season on anybody who isn’t a cop in Hollywood. Who’s got us in the cross-hairs? Why, it’s the police of course. They treat homeless people like dirt. They treat everybody else worse. Don’t let them pull you over or they’ll tow your car at the drop of a hat. Don’t say anything except, “Sir, yes Sir!” or your ass is grass. Any encounter with a Hollywood cop will end in public humiliation at best, a good beating perhaps and even arrest. Say “Cop!” in Hollywood and it’s as bad as yelling “Fire!” People will scatter like ants in the wake of boiling water. Let’s add some multimedia to this posting to give it some meat, or should I say, “edge?”

When I see a black and white police car coming my way, all I do is lower my head in an attitude of complete submission. To do otherwise is to invite hellfire to rain upon my head.

Then let us not forget about the intrusive ghetto birds, also known as police helicopters. Oh, how they stir up the skies above my head, and shine their lights into my pad. They are responsible for many an interrupted night’s sleep.

How fun was that?

Quit Telling me I’m Hell-bound!

Marching Day for the Pentecostals


So what do you think motivates these people? A real need to save souls, spread the gospel, or is it to earn what I call “God Points.” These people are no different from the Catholic Church, which still peddles indulgences. The Catholic form comes in regulating behavior: say the Hail Mary ten times every day and you earn 50 years indulgence! Or something along those lines. They are some suffering from the God delusion and they are trying to push it on others. I find proselytizers annoying, but when I see a crowd like this, I can’t help but laugh.
I’ve accumulated a few funny pictures along the way, so let me present you with the Israelites and Korean Pentecostals, who take the cake for amusing cults.

Korean Pentacostals, © Russell Smith 2011

Israelites, © Russell Smith

The Israelites, © Russell Smith, 2011


So you can see the Pentecostals doing their thing, speaking in tongues, etc. Note the bullhorn near at hand. Now the Israelites got angry with me when I took their picture. Actually only one guy (the Leader?) became agitated. I responded, “Well you are the ones who are looking for attention!” “We’re not looking for attention!” They shouted back in unison, which I found a little creepy, but I said laughing, “You’ve got signs. You don’t want people to look at the signs?” “Get out of here you Devil” said The Leader? getting annoyed at my logic in the face of their outright stupidity, unpatriotic weirdness. I don’t think White people can join this cult, but you never know. There was a Black guy with the Pentecostals. I used to get super annoyed at these proselytizers, and I have them on video saying the stupidest things with me screaming abuse at them. It’s fun to watch but I’m not adding any more media to this post. Hollywood Hugs!

The Artists’ Wall

There is a wall on a building on Highland Ave and someone or somebodies put up art. It changes all the time as the owners of the building tear it down, paint over it and otherwise destroy it. I like to photograph it while there’s time. Here are a couple of examples. I hope you love them as much as I do. If you know where the PowerHouse bar is, then you know what I’m talking about. There’s a terrible Chinese restaurant there too. MSG WARNING! See? Lots of little useful tidbits here on the Hollyblog! See!

© Russell Smith, 2011

© Russell Smith

VIDEO VAULT – RED LINE AND CROSSROADS OF THE WORLD OOOH

Panic in Hollywood

First there was the cult

I don’t know who these morons are. They were standing on the sidewalk (as you can see from the photos) but they objected when I took a picture of a couple of their signs. The second photo shows their leader trying to stop me from filming. They grew very agitated and couldn’t understand that because they were on the sidewalk with signs, then reason dictates that they wanted attention. I wished I’d been running my video camera, but alas. They were videotaping me, so perhaps the whole thing will be captured on YouTube for posterity anyway. Their low-budget frocks are almost endearing. They seemed very earnest and I would have been glad to hear what they think, but I’m Whitie, the blue-eyed Devil. Why can’t we all just get along?

So proud of their signage! ©Russell Smith, 2011

Note the fringe on their frocks! ©Russell Smith, 2011

Then there was the spitter

I saw the man spit at a woman. The woman said he was hitting on her underage daughter and she was trying to make him go away. His unfortunate manner of retaliating against the cock-blocking mother was inappropriate to say the least. He nearly got his ass kicked by the whole neighborhood. What follows are entertaining footage and photographs of the event.

First the videos

Then come the photographs

Figure 1. Restraint

"I have been base." Mercedes, The Count of Monte Cristo, by Dumas

"Run, Rabbit, Run!" John Updike


All we need is rope and a shovel.

The Power of Images

Shall I begin with some gossip?

I saw Andy D. on my own lowbrow street about a month ago in the company of a petite young man with a pretty face. Andy and I locked eyes, and he was so, “Where do I know you from?” He’s a funny man, but deeply troubled. He’s always getting into trouble. I believe he wants to be clean and sober, but the temptations of Hollywood hold him back. If I’ve heard the story once, I’ve heard it a thousand times. Good luck, my friend. Or should I say, “Break a leg?” How do I know he was up to no good? Well, the city erected permanent road blocks along my street which is parallel with Hollywood Blvd. Does that answer your question? If you are from L.A. then that should clear everything up.

Russell gets rejected. Tries again.

Well, Beers & Lambert rejected my six submissions, but the images were shabby and poorly edited. Simple things were amiss like cropping. It’s embarrassing when I think about it now. But hey! We learn from our mistakes. I’ll never enter a contest so late. By the time they’ve reached the deadline, they’ve decided which pieces they want, and which pieces they don’t want.
But all is not lost, gentle readers! I just submitted 6 new pieces to a show right here in Los Angeles. To be exact, I submitted six pieces to LACDA; that is, the Los Angeles Center for Digital Art. I am crossing my fingers. No! Don’t wish me luck! That is bad luck. If all else fails, just tell me to “break a leg.” I entered their snap to grid show which is not a competition, but rather a fund raiser. I haven’t even picked up my suitable for framing copy of the jpeg that I sent down the pike. C’mon Russell! Here’s the image, for your aesthetic appreciation. All Rights Reserved!


ENDORSEMENT

Tom LaBonge- another hit?

I would like to endorse Stephen Box over Tom LaBonge in the upcoming city election. Mr. Box has shown a sincere commitment to “greening” Los Angeles. He is a bicycle activist which is not always a good thing, but he’s thinking about the future. Most politicians just think about lining their pockets. Go to Mr. Box’s web page and compare it to Lefty Labonge’s. You should notice that there is a lack of hucksteria on Mr. Box’s pages, while Mr. LaBonge wants to scare everybody into space suits and freeze themselves for a good one hundred years, give or take. I wonder if he includes his daughter in his diabolical scheme? Bwah ha ha ha ha! I’m sick of Tom LaBonge. He’s so in the pocket of the developers that it isn’t even worth discussing at this point, and how much of the tax payers’ money is going into putting out those semi-talented calendars that he sends out to his poor constituents every year. Why not use that money to set up a scholarship fund? That would be a nice gesture, dontcha think?

A man with a stylist!

The before and after pictures of Stephen Box are courtesy of City Hall Insider.

Hollywood’s Funniest/Scariest Videos

Here’s our first entry, put it under funny

 


The reason this video is so important is that it brings up the issue of the characters and street performers on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. They work so hard, usually under a bright, hot sun. They take their roles seriously and usually just laugh it off when people rip them off. Rip them off? Yes! Tourists will snap their pictures and then scurry off without leaving the role-player a tip. That is egregious. These people have enough money to take a vacation. They should have enough dough to toss a buck at these men and woman. Sometimes I’ve even seen tourists pose and take snapshots of a street character, and then scurry off saying, “No English! No English!” Well, money is the universal language. Just rubbing your thumb against your fingertips indicates that money is in the equation of their interactions. Reason #1 for hating tourists – They rip-off street characters and street performers.

Here’s our second entry, file it under scary


I’ve made it one of my little causes to publish this video far and wide. The faces of the individuals involved are clear and that’s the whole point. Those two bullies should be locked up for a year or two for what they did. See for yourself. Reason #2 for hating tourists- They never know where they’re going. BUT that doesn’t give you the right to rough them up! The saddest part is that the old woman got out of the car thinking she was going to get directions from those two brutes. What a world. What a world.

Like a Bad Penny

They always turn up again†

These poor kids are being forced to stand in the hot sun holding those stupid signs. They are exposed to all kinds of riff-raff on Hollywood Boulevard. Stand on that corner for just half an hour and you will know what I mean. You, the viewer, actually gets to see a moment where some gargantuan in a bra buttonholes one of the girls whose job is to hand out signs.   Another sign holder is an elderly gentleman who is probably lonely, and an obvious target for exploitation. Did you catch those seconds where the lady and her cohort are showing this poor (economically) man how to hold the megaphone while the lady read from the Bible. I mean the Holy Bible. I hope I said it right because I don’t want some Koran-burning, Islamophobes attacking me in an alley here in Hollywood. Artistically I think this is one of the best videos I’ve ever made. Instead of treating the Sun as an enemy, I collaborated with it and allowed it to rather edit the visual effect of the video. Does that make any sense. It reminded me of that made for t.v. movie with Sally Field called Maybe I’ll Come Home in the Spring. The director, Joseph Sargent, has enjoyed a stunning career directing t.v. movies and series. He even directed an episode of Star Trek back in 1966.

Marketing run amok!

†Thank you, Steven King, from “It” — audiobook (2010)

Those Annoying Paper Pushers

Dude from Flatbread feels bad about himself

………………………………………………………………………………

This man refused to stop pushing his glossy business cards about his lousy flat bread. Everybody else on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams recognizes me. All the fellows with their glossy tri-folds, selling tours? You know them; they want to show you Zsa Zsa Gabor’s house, etc. When they see me, some of them say, “Hi!” Sometimes they are glum, if it’s a slow day. Sometimes they are glum if it’s a busy day. Sometimes they are cheerful. God only knows why. The point is – they recognize me and for the most part, knowing that I am a native, they leave me alone.

This man pushed his stupid glossy card in my face one time too many. He was standing there and swishing his hand back and forth as he walked, acting out with extreme disrespect towards the people who dared pass him on the sidewalk and NOT take a card. Who wants to take a card from somebody who is so obviously sick of what he’s doing? If he hates it so much, then quit. I know that there is 12% unemployment in L.A. but you can always get work, even if it’s cleaning toilets. I’d rather clean toilets than stand on the sidewalk in a state of frustration and humiliation. The take home message here is that nobody can make you feel badly about yourself but you. I’m paraphrasing the great Eleanor Roosevelt who was secretly talking to the Black population of America. It was a preamble to the “I am somebody” speech by Dr. Martin Luther King.

Well on this particular day, I was on my way to CVS to pick up my meds. I was in serious pain and suffering from fatigue as well. When he swished that card in my face and sneered at me, I let it out. One word- NO! I am sure you could hear me all the way from La Brea to Highland. I felt the sidewalk shake under my feet. People were grabbing light posts to keep from falling down. It was a mini-tremblor. He was shocked and terrified, realizing that he was messing with someone who could unleash the wrath of Hell. The next time I saw him, he was smart enough to look the other way as I passed. I gave him dagger eyes, just daring him. Just you try it! I psychically transmitted to him. He left me alone. This should be useful to those who find themselves being harassed by the same beggar every day, or other annoying paper pushers. Just take in a lungful of air and scream in their face with all the fury of, well…a Fury, No, no, a thousand times no!

Update – Concrete garden is quiet.

If you want a reminder of what it was like, just watch the video. If not, then that is all. These cops from Hollywood Station (Wilcox) do so hate to work. And they are so out of shape!

Cops! Who needs em?

Cops! Who needs em?

This movie requires Adobe Flash for playback.

Suffer the Children of Jesus Freaks

Or children under the control of Jesus Freaks?

Here is a photo of some underage kids “witnessing” for Christ.

Does he look filled with the spirit? (Click for larger image)

Unless someone is old enough to make adult decisions, like voting or getting married, they should not be asked to proselytize for their religion, especially not in Hollywood, for chrissakes! The only place worse would be downtown Los Angeles. There are already enough wackos, tweekers and mentally ill people who need medication in this ‘hood that makes it a tricky place to drag your child through. These people are taking kids and planting them in one spot, letting the dregs of Hollywood pass them by.

I’ve always been appalled at parents who force their children to go abortion clinics and harass the women who need help inside those doors. It is unconscionable on two levels, first, as I mentioned, they put the child at risk, and secondly they are impeding my progress home when they do that stuff in front of my subway stop, or at the corner that I need to cross. People stop and stare. People stop and argue. People stop and join in. The key word is STOP. When people stop, they muck up the sidewalk traffic; thereby, creating a bit of a public hazard. What if a strong earthquake hits, and people are thrown this way and that? I’d be trampled by the mob. For the women at the birth control clinic, they are being hindered from going to see their doctor. The First Amendment does not protect touching people, and blocking them from medical services that they desperately need.

What about this guy?

I’m pretty sure the man in leather was the person in charge of these kids.

He wants to save your child’s soul? (Click for larger image)

That document box on rollers was where I believe he was storing additional pamphlets, maybe a bible or two, or even other teachings.

Talk about an audible shudder! But even in the first picture, there are some adults standing around the children. Maybe some of them looked like minders, or watchers of the boys. Maybe some were their parents? Who knows? These kids are standing in the middle of a busy corner, holding with a ten foot tall sign that reads, in part, “Believe in Jesus and be Saved.” But the font is more like BELIEVE IN JESUS AND BE SAVED. Ask yourself, “Is this what the average teenager feels like doing on a warm Saturday afternoon?”

Now what I believe to be the scariest part is that there is a cult in Hollywood (not Scientology, okay) whose leader ran afoul of the law on a variety charges ranging from tax evasion to to child molestation. His cult is famous for leaving newspaper-like tracts under your car’s windshield wipers. That’s what makes me wonder about these poor kids. That man is dressed appropriately for any gay bar, even though his face would make a train switch to the dirt road and he’s built like an ice cream cone, of which I’m sure he’s hand more than a few.

What saddens me as well is that these people take advantage of our First Amendment Rights to preach in my face when I want to be left alone. I’m planning on buying a bible. I will get around to it when I can. Purely for reference purposes. My parents gave me one, a King James deluxe, with leather binding and my name embossed on the front. God only knows what happened to it.

Only the Homeless are Free

Arrest? Who? Me?

This morning I heard a man yelling insults, obscenities and threats at 8 o’clock. I looked out the window and saw a tall African-American man with a shopping cart full of stuff garbage bags, and a small Hispanic man who was walking his little doggy. The man with the shopping cart, who I assume is homeless, was extremely upset about the man’s dog, which probably weighed all of one pound. The poor man with the dog couldn’t understand fully why the homeless man was upset. He was just trying to walk his dog. Just then a police car pulled up to a stop sign and the man with the dog flagged them down. The rest is history.

Those silver bracelets!

Well of course the cops spent a lot of time keeping him in handcuffs, and calling the Wilcox Station to see if he had any outstanding warrants. He must have had some kind of I.D. or they would have detained him and taken him back to the station for a fingerprint check, or whatnot. I ran downstairs to give a witness statement. I told them what I saw. Did they write it down? No. Did they ask me for my name or address or any contact info in case they arrested the detainee? No. That’s because they already knew that they weren’t going to arrest him for assaulting the poor guy and his dog. Luckily a passerby was able to translate between the victim and the cop. It makes me sick what goes on in this city, this town of Hollywood. There really is much to say. After everybody left, the cops let the guy go. I took some other photos and pics, so here you go:

That will learn him!

¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬ (below are videos)

Tammy Report

As you can mostly hear, but partly see, Tammy is never one keep her feelings bottled up inside. Maybe we can all learn from Tammy and start yelling “Fuck you!” at whomever we like. Oh, but I already know “people” like that. Today is one of those days when your Hollywood reporter-at-large wished the world would hurry up and run out of resources, that the last oil well will run dry. I want to be here, in the desert when it happens. But maybe that’s just the Tammy in me talking right now.

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